Dating In The Digital Age Is A Hellscape That Is As Easy As It Is Terrifying
Advances in technology have rapidly changed society. The industrial revolution changed the means of production and size of population that we could support, the invention and popularity of the car drastically changed city planning, and the availability of internet and text communication has turned dating into a whole new ball game.
There are definitely a variety of pros and cons to this change, and even though some people fantasize about past "courting" rituals, the digital world is part of dating now whether you like it or not.
Our Relationships Occur In Such A Public Arena
One moment you're talking about what you want to name your future children, the next moment you've blocked each other on all social platforms and deleted their contact information. It's a very tangible form of disassociating that didn't exist in the past.
People You're Not Interested In Can Find You Easily
Listen men: unless I give you my instagram handle and explicitly say you can follow me, you aren't supposed to try to reach me on any other platform other than Tinder.
People Have The Audacity To Be So Public
It's one thing if your man who's not your man because you're too scared to make a move flirts with girls at parties, but how dare you two do it on my post!
The Receipts Are There
It's one thing to get rejected in person, but getting rejected over text/messenger means that your crush can show everyone how they rejected you and you can reread it and be reminded of it constantly.
Smile For The 'Gram :)
You may not care about social media and you have no investment in your online presence, but you're forced to participate in selfies and photoshoots if your significant other does.
It's Way Too Easy To Ruin Your Own Life
Back in the day, you had to drive to your ex's house or wait until the next day to see them and say you miss them if you're lonely. Now it only takes ten seconds of poor decision making and typing.
...And Your Ex Can Still Reach You Too
You're just trying to move on with your life, but the human garbage can you wasted way too much of your life dating can still shoot you messages that you have no desire to receive.
Autocorrect Can Screw You Over
"Who's Abby? I thought you said that we were exclusive and that you weren't talking to anyone else, especially after I CONFRONTED you about it last week and you had the AUDACITY to lie to me!!1"
The Only "Fun Guy" Is Kawhi Leonard
You know in "Green Light" where Lorde says "she thinks you love the beach; you're such a d*** liar"? That's how I feel every time I see my ex trying to pretend he's a good person.
Your Relationship Is On Display For Everyone
Even if you don't run a meme page, social media use means that people generally get an inside look on your relationship, such as couple photos and what not—information that would have been restricted to close family and friends in the past.
But At Least You Can Lick Your Wounds In Privacy
You know, this may have been an absolutely savage move on her part and hurt the guy at the time, but at least no one else had to know about his rejection.
Your Friends Can Easily Stalk Your Crushes
I miss the good old days where my friends just had to take my word for it when I say that the guy I've been talking to is cute. Now they immediately find him and send screenshots to me being like, "ew are you blind?"
Drive-Ins Have Nothing On Streaming
Back in the day, you had to pay for the movie just to make out in your car while it played in the background. Now, you can just sit on the couch and pretend to be interested in watching Paul Blart: Mall Cop for twenty minutes before ignoring the screen.
I Have To Take All The Photo Ops I Can Get
Do I really want a boyfriend or do I just want a guy with long arms to help me take cute photos like that one where he's holding your hand and you're leading him somewhere?
There's Just Too Much Data Available
There's nothing like using my menstrual tracker and having to input information on a sexual encounter and hit "repeated partner" because I got drunk and hooked up with my ex again.
There Is A Lot Of Task Management Involved
This can be fun because then you get to talk to the person twice as much, but now I'm trying to remember what I sent you on Snapchat before I answered your meme DM and text messages.
New Message From 617-867-5309
My greatest flaw is that I never listen to people's names when we're introduced. Suddenly, we've been texting for two weeks but they're just a number in my phone so when I show up to the first date and the hostess asks who I'm meeting I have to say "I don't know."
The Ghosts Can Still Haunt You Forever
You thought that was the last you'd see of him? Oh, no honey. He's going to persistently watch every story you put up on Instagram and like all of your photos despite pretending you don't exist in real life.
If There's A Will, There's A Way
If you can't use traditional means of communicating with the love of your life, there are so many ways you can still reach them if you're innovative. If only Romeo and Juliet had Google Docs...
Despite All These Ways To Communicate, We're Still Not Talking
If you thought that classic dating tactics would entirely die in the digital age, you're a fool. The silent treatment and cold shoulder when you're mad will never go out of style.
