20 Tweets To Get You Ready For Cuffing Season
Well, it's that time of year again. It's cuffing season. It starts with not being able to find a Halloween costume that's funny on its own and then you have this urge to join a bunch of dating sites.
Before you know it, all your friends are taken and you're still swiping left. These tweets should help you get through this trying time for us all.
Living In A Constant State Of Panic Is An Aesthetic.
Name something that's as stressful as going on a first date. They're stressful when you want to go on them, nevermind when you aren't really sure you're into it. At least it's something we all have to go through together, right?
One Of The Worst Things About Cuffing Season?
Your friends start dating, and inevitably one of them always starts dating a loser. Then it somehow always falls to one friend to be the bearer of bad news. Usually, it'sthe one that's still single.
The Signs Are Everywhere...
The signs you should never text him again are around every corner, but of course, come cuffing season so many of us forget how to read. And to listen for that matter... the dating tunnel vision is real.
It's Pretty Widely Known That This Is The Worst Time Of Year To Be Single
It just seems a little more lonely and pathetic. One of two things tends to happen — you either become a strong independent person who doesn't need anyone or you start stalking exes and googling "why am I single?"
At Least She's Being Honest With Her Intentions.
If only we were all so lucky to meet someone online who was going to tell us the whole truth about everything. With ghosting season comes cuffing season. Once the snow starts to melt, so will all your relationships.
It's Always Good To Go In With A Plan...
That way, you can keep your eyes on the prize and when the play doesn't go the way you wanted it, at least you'll know your plan was flawless and it's obviously a lack of talent in your players.
You've Got To Know How To Make The Best Of A Situation
If cuffing season isn't working out, you can still use the opportunity to your advantage. Even without a special someone, you're worth taking advantage of. Everyone deserves the chance to have their heart broken.
The Horror Is All Too Real.
What's scarier than a guy texting 'wyd?' every night at 2 am? It's like the witching hour, only instead of ghosts, that time between 12 am-3 am is when you hear from people who don't deserve you.
Lies Don't Keep Anyone Warm At Night.
Red really is the color of the season, and not just because of all the holiday decorations going up in the neighborhood. Maybe that's why all the red flags are so hard to see...
It Would Be Hard To Choose Between A Person And A Burrito.
But, imagine being able to snuggle with both? Your boo on one side and the burrito on the other with the fire going and Christmas carols playing in the background.
It's All Right To Be A Bit Defensive.
We've all been hurt before. And we've all thought that maybe food is a better choice than love, but let's be real, those weird sugar cookies are gross. Real gross.
It Starts Around Halloween When All You Want Is A Couple's Costume
But life isn't always fair and sometimes you have to start cuffing season dressed up as one half of a cute costume and lay around cold on the nights when you have no one to snuggle with.
It's Like The Flip Of A Switch.
The moment sweater weather makes its appearance, all those feelings of strong independent humans who don't need anyone melts away into the abyss of the coming season. Sweater for two, please.
It Is Unacceptable!
You expect me to sit around and sip cocoa and watch holiday movies on my own? I will! If I have no choice... it might be time to rent that guy as a space heater.
There Are Always Those Who Think Cuffing Season Is Something Else...
Or rather, wish that it were about something else. Because who needs a man when you could just not have one with relationship benefits...wait...that's the game we play all year 'round.
Some People Just Won't Want What You're Selling.
And that's OK, it's their loss. Someone's expired peanut butter is someone a little grosser's peanut butter dream to spread all over the place. Don't worry, there is someone out there for everyone.
It's Amazing The Things We Remember When We're Single.
Who knew that we were talented and interesting all on our own? As great as that is, it doesn't make up for the fact that being super single can be super boring. We all need a little drama to keep life spicey.
It's The Time Of Year When You Reflect On All The Guys You Decided You Didn't Like.
Could one of them be your cuffing season bae? It's impossible to know because now he's off moving too fast with someone else he met on Tinder. What a shame.
Quick, Look Around!
Whoever is left standing is who you have to choose from. It's like a game of musical chairs. The snow starts falling and everyone is booing up and those that are left panic and try to find somewhere to sit.
Just Be Honest About What You Want.
You want a boyfriend because you want a boyfriend. The other terms and conditions don't really apply. There are exceptions to every rule, right? That's how dating works. We just unfortunately never the exception.
