Hilarious Tweets That Won’t Let You Forget You’re Single
Single life isn't too different for most people. If you scroll through Twitter for long enough, you can find at least one person sharing your exact feelings when it comes to being single. Take a moment and look at these hilarious tweets that'll remind you how much you're alone.
You Need To Keep Up When You're Single
When you're single, you have to know the proper way of courting in these modern times. Sending a possible love interest a meme is the perfect crutch, but don't rely on it unless you have the best memes.
Putting On The Act A Little Too Much
When someone tells you their parents died, you need to react. Provide some sympathy, and don't act like you're too cool for that shocking news, no matter what bad advice you get from the internet.
A Harsh Reality
I'm all for body positivity, but it's also great to remain self-aware. Knowing that you're pretty much a catfish makes it easier to accept it when your match doesn't want to hang again.
The Downfall Of An Influencer
Some people, maybe even many people, don't care about social media influencers. Dabbling in that field might keep you single for a while until you find someone who gets it and you. Good luck with that.
Why Is This Her First Response?
I want to know how she knew this off the top of her head and didn't mind sharing it on a first date. That must be why she's still single.
The Tinder Expert
Having Tinder long enough to pick up the small nuisances indicates you couldn't be any more single than you are now. Jared does have a pretty good idea here, if you ask me.
You're Not Valid, Mr. "Owner"
The Twitter streets said it, not me. Your Tinder bio isn't helping you if this is what you have. Your potential matches aren't impressed by your entrepreneurial dreams and visions.
It's Important To Spice Things Up
Sometimes you have to do what others aren't willing to do. Spicing things up in your relationship never hurts, even if it's with yourself. At least you accept your predicament.
The First Sign Of A Single Person
If you automatically assume your date asked you about non-human relationships, you've more than likely been single for too long. Or maybe you just like your shoes a bit too much.
Be Realistic With Yourself
Save the humiliation for another day, my friend. Being single is great, but it can get lonely. This tweet showcases a high level of not caring about changing your status.
At Least She Knows What She Wants
I don't know who Jade is, but I'm sure someone out there will agree to these terms. The only real work involved is when you have to unclog the shower drain.
Can't Even Win Over Your Tinder Matches
After getting a Tinder match, choosing the right time to respond is a bit difficult, but you don't wait two weeks. Habits like this will keep you single for a while.
Yup, That's All There Is To It!
If this man's tweet was all you had to do in a relationship, there might not be any single people. Unfortunately for this guy, he has to do a lot more to keep someone.
Too Soon, Rookie
You don't ask this question until at least the third date. Your potential partner will know you've got a couple of screws loose if you ask this so early in the process. You have to hide your insanity until they're invested in you.
This Is Why You Can't Trust Siri
Siri knew what it was doing the whole time, but decided to let this girl suffer being alone even longer. A crush doesn't want to receive a text like this.
She Fumbled The Ball
Admitting you have plants that you kiss at the introduction might isolate you faster than an infected patient. That's something you save until at least the third or fourth date.
You Don't Like Hiking, Bro?
It does feel like you're at a disadvantage if you don't like a good hike. It's what all the other singles do, so you should get with the times, buddy.
How To End A Date 101
The date ends the moment you ask this question, even though you might still have to finish your meal. In no way is this something you need to know about someone on the fist date or two.
The Dad Joke You Need To Retire
Sure, this joke was phenomenal when it first became a thing, but it needs to go now. If she notices you do this, she'll probably think you're corny or a meathead.
I'll Take The Check
What on Earth is hot salad? Yeah, if you can't even order a real dish while on a date, that will probably be your last one with that person. Nerves always want to take over.
