An Instagram Account Captures Boys’ Most Chaotic Cooking Attempts

When looking for someone to date, the ability to cook can earn huge points with a partner. However, there's a staggering difference between being "able" to cook and actually being good at it, as Instagram account @boyswhocancook hilariously showcases.

These are some of the most ridiculous (and disgusting) meals and kitchen habits that they've curated from boys and men.

It's Technically Not Wrong, But It's Not Right, Either

Tweet one: This is exactly why you don't ask men to put the food up (photo of spaghetti in a drink pitcher). Person two: is the food not put up?
Photo Credit: Twitter / @CrazyJuice_ / @zmullis
Photo Credit: Twitter / @CrazyJuice_ / @zmullis

This attempt to put away food exists in a grey area where he did technically do what was asked, yet still somehow managed to do it in the worst way possible.

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Just A Casual Snack In Case He Gets Angry Mid-Exam

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why did this kid bring a loaf of bread to the exam (photo of man at desk with open full loaf of bread)
Photo Credit: Twitter / @MyFavsTrash
Photo Credit: Twitter / @MyFavsTrash
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I think the most disturbing part of this action is that it's not even your classic sliced bread. This man really just transported a whole loaf without a bag, and he's prepared to just rip off chunks of bread if he feels hungry.

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Can These Be Considered A Hate Crime?

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Photo Credit: Instagram / @boyswhocancook
Photo Credit: Instagram / @boyswhocancook
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Listen, there's nothing wrong with trying to experiment with foods from different cultures and create fusion foods, but there's something unholy and borderline hateful about these bologna, green pea, and potato "tacos."

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Everything Is Not What It Seems

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person making pasta adds orange powder flavor to pot instead of cheese mix, but it still looks like mac n cheese
Photo Credit: Instagram / @boyswhocancook
Photo Credit: Instagram / @boyswhocancook
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Ladies, picture this: The guy you've been dating recently invites you over for dinner, promising that he'll cook for you. Not only is it Kraft Dinner, but it's straight-up orange flavored. How quickly do you ghost him?

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I Don't Remember This Flavor Of Capri Sun

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person sticks a straw into a package of ranch dressing like it's a capri sun
Photo Credit: Instagram / @boyswhocancook
Photo Credit: Instagram / @boyswhocancook
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I have to confess that I have never—and likely will never—acquired a taste for ranch dressing, but I'm sure most people would agree that drinking it like juice is a step too far.

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You're Right, I Do Not Understand

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Tweet: Banana and mayo sandwich it's a Long Island thing y'all wouldn't understand
Photo Credit: Twitter / @nixsane
Photo Credit: Twitter / @nixsane
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Are people in Long Island okay? Is someone holding the entire island's population hostage and forcing you to eat this? Please send us a distress signal if you need help.

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"Can You Bring A Dessert To The Potluck?"

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sliced cucumber on plate labelled
Photo Credit: Instagram / @boyswhocancook
Photo Credit: Instagram / @boyswhocancook
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I won't lie: baking isn't easy. Unlike regular cooking, baking is a science that requires precise measurements and a specific cooking time. Sometimes, it's just safer to slice up a cucumber and rebrand it as a new type of "cookie."

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"Babe, Let's Eat Meditteranean Food Tonight"

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photo of tomatoes with a couple chunks of feta on top
Photo Credit: Instagram / @boyswhocancook
Photo Credit: Instagram / @boyswhocancook
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Salad in general is a subpar meal, but this man somehow managed to make things even worse by creating what is either the worst Caprese or Greek salad of all time.

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He Really Said "Casedea"

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person eating a quesadilla labels it
Photo Credit: Instagram / @boyswhocancook
Photo Credit: Instagram / @boyswhocancook
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The food itself actually looks like a pretty acceptable meal, but I could not let this spelling of "quesadilla" go without comment. Gentlemen, spellcheck is your best friend.

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Root Beer Float, But Make It Disgusting

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Photo Credit: Twitter / @notviking
Photo Credit: Twitter / @notviking
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Have you ever wanted to make a specific dish but realized you didn't have some of the necessary ingredients? Sometimes you can make substitutions—but sometimes you should just make a run to the grocery store.

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A Cursed Attempt At Vegetarian Pizza

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pizza with strawberries instead of pepperoni
Photo Credit: Instagram / @boyswhocancook
Photo Credit: Instagram / @boyswhocancook
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It's time for the people who like pineapple on pizza and the people who detest it to stop their war in order to take on the true enemy: the sicko who put strawberries on this slice.

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Breakfast Is The Most Important Meal Of The Day!

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three photos show man cooking eggs in redbull instead of oil
Photo Credit: Instagram / @boyswhocancook
Photo Credit: Instagram / @boyswhocancook
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Why would you have coffee with breakfast when you could get two birds stoned at once by going for maximum efficiency and mixing your caffeine into the cooking process in the morning?

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Is This What The Brits Have Been Raving About All This Time?

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bowl of goldfish crackers and potato chips labelled
Photo Credit: Instagram / @boyswhocancook
Photo Credit: Instagram / @boyswhocancook
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I don't know what all the hype about fish and chips as a meal is when it clearly costs less than $2 to make and only has a preparation time of one minute.

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First Of All, Why Would You Want Brownies To Look Like Corn?

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Photo Credit: Facebook / Michael Dolan
Photo Credit: Facebook / Michael Dolan
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When baking, you have to respect people who take risks and try something new, but that doesn't mean that anyone will want to eat your brownies that look like they were scooped up by a dog owner.

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Honestly, Can't Say I Have

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Tweet: y'all ever had a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with chicken in the middle? (with accompanying photo of said creation)
Photo Credit: Twitter / @VictorPopeJr
Photo Credit: Twitter / @VictorPopeJr
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It can be hard to make sure you're getting the necessary nutrients in your daily diet, with many people not getting enough protein on a regular basis. If you're willing to overlook the horrible flavor combination, this might be the healthy choice for you!

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"Cran" Is Short For "Crayon"—Spread The Word

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Photo Credit: Twitter / @mattdaly
Photo Credit: Twitter / @mattdaly
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There's a reason why Crayola products are non-toxic, and it's not because they don't want children—who put everything in their mouths—to get sick; it's so we can make sick cocktails.

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I Genuinely Wonder How This Would Taste, Though

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Photo Credit: Instagram / @boyswhocancook
Photo Credit: Instagram / @boyswhocancook
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Scientists are constantly telling us about the importance of incorporating green foods into our diets, but they never clarified as to whether that "green" had to be natural or not.

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Nachos On A Budget

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Photo Credit: Instagram / @boyswhocancook
Photo Credit: Instagram / @boyswhocancook
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How to make "free" nachos! Step one: steal multiple packs of saltine crackers from the soup station at the first cafeteria you find. Also grab a single packet of hot sauce. Step two: borrow your roommate's expired sour cream and Kraft singles. Step three: bone apple teeth.

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I Was Today Years Old When Oreos Became Unappetizing

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I was today years old when I found out the middle row in a pack of oreos was actually for salsa (with demonstrative photo)
Photo Credit: Instagram / @boyswhocancook
Photo Credit: Instagram / @boyswhocancook
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Some people like to split Oreos and eat the icing first. Some people like to dip them in milk. Some people like to crush Oreos up and mix them into ice cream. Some people just like to watch the world burn.

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This Is Why Men Die Younger Than Women

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y'all never had real chicken if it ain't medium rare (photo of clearly undercooked chicken burger)
Photo Credit: Instagram / @boyswhocancook
Photo Credit: Instagram / @boyswhocancook
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Death is an inevitable part of life, and we often can't control the circumstances under which we leave this world. However, you can control whether or not you order a side of salmonella with your chicken burger.