Weird Things That Happen To Your Body When You’re Angry At An Ex
You can't always control the anger you feel towards your ex. They have hurt you or betrayed you, and you have every right to wish they'd just fall off the face of the planet. Yet, at some point, holding on to this anger will do you more harm than good, and your body will notice before you do.
The First Part Of Your Body To Feel Angry Is...
The brain is the first one to get angry. The first thing that gets triggered is the amygdala, which is the part of your brain that controls your "fight or flight" instinct. More often than not, in this case, you feel more inclined to fight.
It Sends You A Warning Signal
Anger can be a healthy emotion. It's important to listen to it because it's the brain's way of trying to communicate with you and signal that something is wrong.
"Anger is often responsible for letting us know when our boundaries have been crossed, when our values are at risk, or when we are not being true to ourselves," says consultant and coach Dr. Barbara Cox in her book, The Muse Process: Unleashing the Power of the Feminine for Success and Fulfillment.
Your Muscles Tense Up
You might feel a little tense or even sore because anger causes the blood to pump faster and muscles begin to contract.
While this happens, the rest of the body is trying to calm down and is almost working against itself, making you feel restless.
You Get An Adrenaline Rush
The brain signals the adrenal glands, where adrenaline is produced. The body responds by giving you an adrenaline rush that fills you with energy. This is why some people might feel like punching something when they're angry.
You're Three Times More Likely To Have A Heart Attack
A tense body releases cholesterol and a group of chemicals called catecholamines, which encourage fatty deposits to pile up in the heart.
Because of this, angry people are up to five times more likely to have a heart attack, according to one 2014 study in the European Heart Journal.
Your Judgment Gets Cloudy
Your ability to make decisions is in the frontal lobe. However, when you get angry, the frontal cortex gets flooded with blood, which clouds logic and rational judgment. This is why it's important to calm down before you decide on slashing your ex's tires.
You Can Literally Become A Different Person
Anger is such a highly physiological emotion that all the changes going on in your body when you're angry can make you literally become a different person. Think of the adrenaline rush as causing you to go from your normal self to an "Incredible Hulk" state.
You Get "Stronger"
Your Hulk state is all thanks to all the adrenaline kicking in. This makes your body feel able to defend itself.
The combination of your muscles starting to twitch, your blood pressure and heart rate rising, and your pupils dilating can make you feel like you could lift your ex and toss him aside with your bare hands.
It Increases Your Risk Of A Stroke
One study found that you are more likely to have a stroke from a blood clot or bleeding in the brain during the two hours after an angry outburst. The risk of bursting an aneurysm after an angry outburst is even higher.
So, basically, remain calm for as long as possible—your ex isn't worth it.
Your Face Gets Red
This is a result of your increased blood pressure. Your heart rate increases and blood starts pumping to your head—where your face lives—so that's why it gets red.
Think of those cartoons where the character gets red and smoke comes out of their nose. This is also because breathing can get shallow as you enter a "fight-or-flight" response.
You Talk Louder
The adrenaline pumping through your body is giving you all this extra energy that your body needs to spend somehow, so you start to talk louder or even yell without noticing. Ironically, this can get you more hyped up and keep you in your angry state longer.
You Can Literally See Red
The expression "seeing red" comes from the actual experience of blood flowing to your head. The blood flow in the capillaries of the eyes increases, and this can sometimes make some people literally "see red."
Your Stomach Hurts
The rush of blood from the fight-or-flight response takes away from the blood going to the right places in the right amount. Your nervous system cuts blood flow to your stomach and sends it to your muscles instead.
This can make you feel nauseated as it's impacting the digestive system's intestinal tract contractions.
All You Can Focus On Is Your Anger
When we're angry, we basically only see the world through those angry eyes. So even if people are talking around you, your anger makes it difficult to actually understand, hear, or interpret them. You're reduced to having a single-minded purpose.
That means that while you're wasting time still being mad at someone who's now part of your past, you're missing out on what is going on around you in the present.
It Can Create Symptoms Of Generalized Anxiety Disorder
If you weren't already anxious enough to get past your relationship, caving in to anger can worsen symptoms of generalized anxiety disorder, according to one 2012 study.
Anxiety will make you feel an excessive and uncontrollable worry that interferes with your daily life and makes it even harder to let go or try dating again.
Hostility Hurts Your Lungs
We're not saying to go be best friends with your ex, but the hostility you still hold towards them is changing your lung function, according to a 2006 study in the journal Thorax. The higher the hostility level, the more degradation of your lungs over time, and with that comes a higher risk of respiratory problems.
You'll Get Sick Easier
If you're still spending a lot of energy being mad at your ex all the time, you might also be finding yourself getting sick more often. Anger lowers your immune system.
Some studies show that even in healthy people, just recalling an angry experience from their past caused a six-hour dip in levels of immunoglobulin A, the first line of defense against infection.
Anger Can Drive You Into Depression
Some studies have linked depression with anger, especially in men. They go hand and hand, and feeling one can lead to feeling both.
You need to stop thinking so much and distract yourself. There is so much more to life than lamenting over a person who doesn't deserve it.
Anger Can Make You Become Forgetful
There is a reason you sometimes feel like you blacked out during a stressful situation or angry episode.
"Elevated cortisol kills neurons in the hippocampus, which is where we create memories. This disrupts the creation of new memories and suppresses activity in the hippocampus, which weakens short-term memory. It also prevents you from forming new memories properly," says counselor Rebecca Frank.
It Can Shorten Life
If you want to live longer, you can't stay angry and hope that Olay's 7 Step Anti-Aging Cream will counterbalance your life span.
A study over a 17-year period found that couples who hold in their anger have a shorter lifespan than those who readily say when they're mad and get over it. So unless you want to die young, it's time to let go of your anger against your unworthy ex.