How To Drop Hints When You’re Too Scared To Make The First Move
Sometimes, you need a little strategy to move things along a little more quickly. If you're interested in someone but you're not sure if they feel the same way, there are certain tricks to ignite that spark with them and push them towards making the first move.
Mirror Their Gestures
The way a person acts around you through their body language reveals a ton about how you make them feel.
Psychologists have noticed that you can actually create a closer bond by mirroring someone, even if you're doing those gestures consciously. Next time you see them leaning, do the same.
Ask Them Questions That Highlight You
You want this person to realize how great of a catch you are. There's nothing wrong with pointing it out to them if they haven't noticed yet.
Open their eyes by asking hem questions like, "Most people would be lucky to date me, don’t you think?”
Hold Eye Contact Longer
Some studies show that direct eye contact communicates nonverbal cues by breaking down barriers so that the other person can get a glimpse into what you're thinking or how you're feeling.
When you hold it longer than five seconds, it creates intimacy and lets them know you're interested.
A Smile Goes A Mile
When someone smiles at you, you naturally feel inclined to smile back. This is another great way to use "mirroring" to your advantage with a flirtatious twist.
Plus, you can't help but smile at someone you like, so watch for how dilated their pupils get and how they respond to your smile. You'll know if you're on the right track!
Break The Touch Barrier Subtly
The touch barrier is an important point of comfort that allows for closer bonding once you break it.
You can easily and subtly break it by doing things like putting a hand on their shoulder when you laugh or a hand on their knee when you're saying something important.
Take Interest In Their Hobbies
Make this person feel valued and important.
There's no way they won't notice the effort you're putting in if you've never watched a football game in your life and suddenly you're talking about last night's game because their team was playing.
Invite Them Out With Your Friends
If you're too afraid to ask them to hang out one on one, invite them to a group event.
This will allow you to start to get to know each other while avoiding awkward silences thanks to other people chiming in.
Look Away And Then Glance At Them Again
This is a great way of flirting and inviting interest. Not only are you looking at them once, but you're looking at them twice, confirming your intent and your attraction.
It is very likely that the other person will receive the invitation and act on it.
Get Comfortable With Feeling Nervous
The nerves and the butterflies are what make having a crush exciting! It's completely natural and shows a moment of vulnerability and attraction, so embrace it.
Rather than shying away the next time they look at you, hold that contact and see how long you can prolong it.
Brush Against Their Hand When You Walk Alongside Them
It's okay if you're feeling too scared to make a big first move, but this is a great way to gradually work them into making it themselves.
If you gently brush against their hand when you walk beside them, they might then be inclined to just grab it.
Expect Them To Be A Good Match For You
This is what some psychologists refer to as the Pygmalion Effect. It basically means that we tend to act according to the expectations that people set for us.
So if you think they're a player, you might encourage them subconsciously to be, and if you expect them to be better to you and treat you well, they might thrive to do so instead!
Create A Romantic Environment
That doesn't mean you should carry around candles and roses for the right opportunity, but try to invite them to an event that enhances the possibility of sparks flying.
That can be anything from making them soup when you learn they're sick, to leaving them cute notes on their desk.
Turn To Sit Facing Them
According to some research, women who face their chairs out toward the man they are interested in or who open their stance when standing, seem to be the most inviting to approach.
Think about it: if you're sitting facing someone, you close yourself in with them, so it's like you're both in your own world now. If you're sitting away from them, you're closing yourself off instead.
Play With Your Hair
It's super cliché, but it works, especially for women. Some studies have proven that women do like to touch their hair because it gives them a rush of oxytocin.
Men then pick up on it and react accordingly.
Show Them You're Listening Attentively
One of the easiest ways to let someone know you care is to simply listen. This allows you to truly be in the moment with one another and form a bond.
Show them you're listening by asking follow-up questions or opening up yourself.
Surprise Them With A Kind Act
A great hint to drop is an act of kindness. It doesn't have to be big, but just big enough to say that you were thinking about them.
You can buy them a coffee in the morning for example, if you both work together.
Say Their Name When You Talk
Studies show that people get excited and subconsciously respond to the sound of their own name, especially when it's spoken by someone they're interested in.
This means that working it into the conversation is a way of flirting.
Get Specific About Your Compliments
Make them feel special while letting them know that you're paying attention to them. Anyone can say "I like your eyes," so you want to get more specific. Try instead: "I like the way your eyes go from blue the green when you look into the light."
Better yet, instead of physical compliments, find a way to highlight their personality and skills.
Ask For Their Opinion
By asking for their advice or opinion, even if it's on a simple matter, you're inadvertently expressing to them that you find them intelligent, share their morals, and value their way of thinking.
Plus, this will get them more comfortable coming to you in return and will get you closer.
Be Bold, Take A Leap And Just Ask Them Out
You could wait from here till next year hoping and praying that the person who interests you will finally pick up on your hints and be interested enough to act on it.
Or you could just take a leap of faith and ask them out and see what happens. Then, even if they reject you, you'll save yourself the time and energy you're putting into dropping hints for an uncertain result.
It Might Be Possible That You're Missing Some Signs As Well
If you're crushing hard on him but don't have the guts to come out and say it, then there might be a chance that he's feeling the same way.
There are some things you can look for to see if he's showing signs of being interested before you take that leap of faith.
His Friends Always Tease Him When You're Around
How do his friends treat him when you're around? Are they joking with him and encouraging him to talk with you? Do they go out of their way to make sure that the two of you can sit near each other?
Even more telling is when they start teasing him about you. That's like guy code for "we know a secret and don't know how to keep it."
He Makes Excuses To See You Rather Than Asking You Out
He is always down to hang out. In fact, it often seems like he makes reasons to hang out with you.
However, he never calls any of these hangouts dates, even if you're doing date-like things.
He Has A Hard Time Making Eye Contact
When a shy guy really likes you, he's going to have a hard time making eye contact with you, especially if it's just the two of you hanging out.
It feels vulnerable, and they might be afraid that the cat will be out of the bag if they make too much direct eye contact.
He Gets Jealous When He Sees You With Another Guy
When he hears that you're hanging out with another guy or sees a text pop up on your phone from an ex, he starts to act distant and weird.
He might not come out and act like a jealous boyfriend, but you can tell that something is off with him.
He Always Seems A Little Bit On Edge
He might seem a little on edge a lot of the time. He's not on edge in a way where he can't relax, but you can feel all this nervous energy around him.
He's probably trying hard to impress you and say the right things, and you're picking up on that.
He's More Talkative Through Text
A promising sign that he has a crush on you is when he's more talkative through text or messaging than in person.
This isn't uncommon for a lot of us. Talking in person is so nerve-racking. Sometimes that little screen between you two can make him feel braver.
He Agrees With Almost Everything You Say
If you've noticed that he tends to agree with everything you say, it might be a sign that he likes you.
Guys tend to be afraid of saying something stupid or having an opinion that conflicts with yours. To avoid that, they think the best thing to do is agree with you.
He Confides In You
Guys have a hard time being vulnerable and emotional with other people. If you've found that the guy you like has started to open up to you about some serious things, it's because he trusts you and feels that emotional connection.
In his mind, you're his person—the one he can trust.
He Seems Interested
We tend to have a pretty good gut feeling about these things. If you sit back and think about it, do you feel like he's interested?
If you feel like there is that connection there between the two of you, then he's probably feeling it, too.