Telltale Signs That A Guy Is Lying To You (And What To Do About It)
You can hope that the person you're dating is an honest and genuine partner, but unfortunately, not everyone in the dating pool has the best intentions.
Thankfully, there are a handful of signs you can watch out for to decide if you have encountered a liar, and what you should do to deal with them.
He Repeats Himself Multiple Times
Guys tend to get nervous when they lie, even if it's a subconscious response.
They will usually start to repeat themselves multiple times as a way to try and convince you of a lie.
Ask Him More Details And See How Long It Takes For Him To Say Something Different
The best way to tell if a guy is lying or whether he's just prone to repeating himself is to ask him more details about whatever it is.
See how long it takes him to say something different or add new information. He shouldn't have anything to hide so he should be willing to chat with you about it.
He Stammers A Lot More When Explaining Things
Unless you're dating a serial liar who is practiced in being deceptive, there's a good chance he's going to trip up a little bit when he lies to your face.
It may sound like more "ums" and "uhs" or long pauses before answering you.
He Takes Really Long Pauses Before Answering You
Long pauses before answering a question and slow responses are signs that he's preparing an answer in his head before saying it out loud.
Some people are slow talkers, but if he's suddenly pausing a lot more than usual, he could be hiding something.
He Avoids Being Alone With You
If the guy that you're dating is trying to hide something or cover up a big lie, he's probably going to try and avoid being alone with you until he feels confident enough to face you.
Take notice if he starts avoiding spending one-on-one time with you.
Don't Let Him Avoid Seeing You Face-To-Face
The more time that you spend talking, the more likely it is that the will be put in a position where he might have to lie, digging himself a deeper hole.
If you think he might be lying, don't let him squirm away from facing you until he's ready. You deserve to know the truth.
He Talks In Absolutes
Talking in absolutes means saying things like "I would never lie to you," or "I would never cheat on you."
He may not ever intend to hurt you or lie, but the truth is he can't promise that. Saying something absolute like "I could never lie" doesn't mean that he physically can't, just that he's trying to convince you he can't.
He Accuses You Of Being A Liar
It takes a liar to know one, and if he's accusing you of lying out of the blue it's most likely a projection of his own insecurities.
Instead of risking getting called out on his lies, he makes you the target and puts you on the defensive.
He's Weirdly Protective Over His Phone
Someone's phone should be their own business, but if he is weirdly protective over his cell it could be because he's hiding something.
It's not an excuse to go snooping through his phone, but you could mention that you have noticed he's guarding it more than usual to see his response.
He Gets Overly Defensive
When a guy goes on the defensive way too aggressively, it's never a good sign.
He should be willing to have open communication with you about whatever you bring up, even if it's not the most comfortable subject.
He Has Passive-Aggressive Responses To Keep You From Asking Questions
Most liars have a tendency to act defensively, especially if someone is asking too many questions.
They will attempt to deflect the conversation and may even get snappy and say something like "what's with the interrogation?"
Keep The Conversation Calm And Ask What You Want To
If you sense a guy is starting to get defensive during a conversation, gently continue asking questions without being confrontational or forceful.
If he still puts up spikes to keep you out it's a red flag.
He Avoids Eye Contact At All Costs
Just because a guy is lying doesn't mean he won't feel guilt about it.
The easiest way to avoid feeling that overwhelming sense of guilt is to avoid looking you in the eyes.
He Creates Space Between You Two
He may try and physically create space between the two of you when you're together.
Behavior like leaning away, sitting across the room, and completely avoiding eye contact are all signs that he's distracted by something he doesn't want to mention.
He Gets Jumpy And Nervous Around You
People who are keeping a lie or a secret tend to be jumpy and nervous because they are afraid they will be discovered.
Body language can reveal a lot about a person and if he's lying he may start to act a little jumpier around you.
He's Always Trying To Distract You
A good liar knows that the easiest way out of the lie is to distract people and change the subject so that they don't have to explain themselves.
If someone is lying to you in a relationship, there are a few ways they could try and distract you.
There Are Different Kinds Of "Distractions"
He may shower you with gifts or surprises like little trips or dates to try and keep your mind focused on the good parts of your relationship.
This doesn't mean you should always be suspicious of nice gestures, that would be crazy.
Pay Attention To New Behaviors
However, if you do recognize that the guy you're dating suddenly seems to up his relationship game whenever you have questions or concerns, it could be because he's trying to keep you distracted.
It's up to you whether or not the distractions will work.
Confront A Liar About Their Actions
The best way to deal with a liar is to call them out on their lies and let them know that you're not being fooled by them.
Be prepared for them to try and flip things around on you and accuse you of lying or being "crazy."
You Deserve Open Communication In A Relationship
You deserve open communication in your relationship and should be able to expect that from a partner at the very least.
If you can't ask him questions without him blowing up, it's probably best to ditch him now.