The Highs And Lows Of Going Through A Breakup
There is no worse feeling than a broken heart. It feels like you're grieving, and you don't know how to be alone anymore. The first stages are full of pain, but on the bright side, it gets better.
Breakups are also an opportunity for a fresh start and a blank slate that is all about you and what you want. We are here to guide you through the worst and get you back to your best.
Having To Ignore Someone You Talked To Every Day
It's hard to go from texting the same person about anything and everything every single night to not hearing from them at all.
This is the person you shared your entire life with, and who was your go-to. It takes time to be able to process that they're not your person anymore.
Knowing that Someone Who Once Loved You Might Now Hate You
It is such a comforting feeling to be loved and cared for, so as soon as you realize that the person you trusted to love you no longer does, it can feel like your whole world is falling apart.
Don't let this make you question your worth. Their reason for not wanting the relationship anymore has nothing to do with you not being worthy of love.
Wondering If There's Something You Could've Done Differently
It's easy to get caught up doing a play by play in your mind, trying to figure out the exact instance it went wrong, wonder why, and if there's anything you could've done to prevent it. You have to let go of guilt and accept the present moment rather than get caught up in the past.
Missing The Little Things You Used To Do Together
Sometimes a song will come on that used to play while you cleaned the house together or driving to the grocery store, and it will trigger a bunch of memories making you miss that person intensely at that moment.
Know that it's okay to hold on to the good memories. Those memories have shaped you, so it's okay to take the good from them.
Realizing You Have To Open Yourself Up To Someone New
It took a lot to get yourself to open up and be completely vulnerable with them. It took months to show them all parts of you and share the worst ones. It's so hard to imagine having to start that process all over again.
Take comfort in knowing that when you are ready, it will happen naturally, and you will do it willingly.
Running Into Each Other And Having To Act Like Strangers
It's so weird how the person who used to hold you for hours is now on the same level as a stranger, to the point where you both don't even know how to be around each other anymore.
This can make for very awkward encounters when you do meet. The best thing to do is to just say hi and bye and be civil.
Seeing Them With Someone Else
Although this might not happen right away, the thought is on your mind. You're constantly wondering what they're doing without you and who they're with, which can be hard enough.
However, the moment that you see them actually moving on can be quite painful. Just remember: if they can do it, you can do it too.
Losing Your Sense Of Routine
Once you lose the person you did everything with, it's normal to feel lost and not know how to do the everyday things anymore.
It's all about starting a new routine that has you doing the things that YOU like YOUR way now, until that becomes habit and you adapt to it.
Wiping Any Trace Of Them From Your Life
Sometimes, to numb the pain, "out of sight, out of mind" is the best strategy. So, you find yourself clearing the house of any items that belonged to them, deleting any pictures of the two of you together, and removing them from social media. By the end, it's like you never even met.
Seeing Them Be Okay Without You
Sometimes, the hardest part of a breakup is seeing your ex be okay without you, when you don't feel okay without them. You want them to be hurting like you are, you want them to care. But guess what? They're not okay either, they're just good at hiding it.
You'll start to feel okay eventually. It'll be hard at first, but it'll get easier every day.
Enjoying The Little Things, Like Having A Whole Bed To Yourself
No more sharing anything! Take the time to enjoy the little things like going to bed whenever you want, in a bed where you can spread out like an eagle and get all your beauty sleep. Eventually, all the little moments will add up. The more of them you find, the happier you'll feel.
Having More Time To Get Fit
It's time to work on that revenge bod!
Now that you have more time on your hands, why not use it productively? Trips to the gym will not only give you something to do and help you create a new sense of routine, but they will also release happy chemicals in your body and have you looking and feeling your best!
Seeing Your Bank Account Dollars Increase
No more taking turns buying dinner for two and spending money on dates. Now all your money is yours!
You'll be amazed at how quickly your bank account grows while you're single. This is a great opportunity to save money and put it towards a trip. It will give you a goal to work toward and a trip to look forward to.
Learning To Love Yourself Again
It's normal to feel the need for validation from your ex after a breakup. A breakup can make you wonder if you weren't enough and shake your confidence. So, one of the best parts of a breakup is also learning to love yourself all over again.
Get your hair done, change up your makeup, do some yoga and some journaling, and you'll find yourself falling in love with yourself and radiating!
Not Having To Answer To Anyone
No one is there to check up on you. That means you can go enjoy your girls' night, stay up as long as you want, flirt with whoever you want, and dance your heart out until your heels break.
Go have fun, go get crazy, do whatever makes you feel alive.
Getting Back Out There
Once you finally feel ready, it feels amazing to put yourself back out there and go back to the very first stages of dating where all someone wants to do is flatter and impress you.
Let them remind you what it's like to have butterflies and get excited deciding what to wear for a first date. Dating again can be fun!
Building A New Routine That's All About You
We said that one of the worst parts of a breakup is losing your routine with your ex, right? But building a new one is also the best part! You get to decide whatever you want to do! No more having to take into account their lifestyle, habits, and schedule, and if you want to leave dishes in the sink for a week now, that's okay too.
Reconnecting With Friends And Family
Your friends and family will be your greatest support system during your healing phase, so don't be afraid to rely on them. You may have canceled plans a bunch of times in favor of your ex, or not had as much time to go visit your parents, so now is your chance to make up for lost time. Let them distract you and soak in their love.
Realizing That You Found Out Sooner Rather Than Later
Well, you're not getting any younger. There is some peace in knowing that it happened now rather than later, when you were more invested, attached, and further in your life. There is never a good time to get heartbroken, but the earlier it happens the faster you will heal.
Having The Right Lessons And Tools For The Next Person
The best part of a failed relationship is the lessons it taught. Like Kelly Clarkson said, "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger." Every relationship teaches you about who you are and what you want from another person.
Take those tools and make your next relationship the best it can be—when you're ready.
